I thought I could care for people unconditionally without hoping anything in return. I thought I can help and be a good listener or helper in providing some emotional support. But I was wrong. It never been easy to help someone when in fact your are the one who need help. It just a pitiful of your own self because you try to make other people feel better but you are still the one who are still struggling. It is more pitiful when the person you help have found their happiness while you are still defining your own happiness. It never been been easy.
Just focus on myself, heal myself first before healing others, find my own happiness first before helping someone finding their happiness. I try to be strong, but I just don’t have the capacity.
Stop hurting yourself. Heal yourself first, Amalina. That is too much for you to bear.
May you find your happiness, Amalina. If not in this world, maybe in the hereafter.
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