Sampai Nilai tadi, ayah minta aku ganti drive. Ayah dah ngantuk. Alhamdulillah rasa bangga la juga ayah boleh percaya aku drive jauh-jauh dah haha. Boleh la ayah rehat kat belakang tu ha.
Kebetulan beberapa km aku drive, hujan kejap-kejap turun. Nak cakap lebat, tak jugak. Masih awal-awal hujan turun. Beberapa kali ayah ingatkan, "Bawak perlahan je dik. Awal-awal hujan ni jalan licin. Bawak dalam 100 je." Memang selalunya kalau hujan, ayah akan pesan macam tu lah. Banyak kali pun takpelah. Ayah memang risau kalau anak dia drive dalam hujan.
Tak lama depan tu, ada sebuah kereta baru terbabas kat jalan belah kiri. Dua buah kereta. Baru je kot tak silap. Langgar divider. Tapi aku rasa mungkin tak teruk sangat. Aku pun tak sempat tengok betul-betul. Berdebar jugak lah aku nasib tak bawak laju dan sempat ke kanan.
Ayah beberapa kali cakap, ha tu mungkin sebab bawak laju lah tu, lepas tu hilang kawalan, brek, tu terus membuang tu. Barulah aku dapat rasa kenapa banyak kali ingatkan aku drive slow-slow.
Aku drive lah kat lane kanan dulu. Selang beberapa km lepas tu, ada pulak sebuah kereta terbabas kat lane kanan. Baru jugak rasanya. Kali ni arah kereta memang terpusing terus. Ini pun aku tak pasti teruk ke tidak. Ah, berdebar lagi. Hujan masih turun.
Aku terus ke lane kiri. Lepas ni harap takde dah perkara yang buat jantung berdebar.
Beberapa km lepas tu pulak, ada 4x4 potong belah kanan. Dari tempat aku drive, aku macam nampak ada benda nak melayang keluar. Ah, sudah! Apa benda pulak tu! Benda melayang tu akhirnya terbang keluar jugak. Dua tiga kotak polisterin kosong melayang keluar.
Melalu perkiraan aku, kotak tu memang akan melayan masuk lane aku ni. Nak brek terus sangat pun tak boleh. Jalan licin. Belakang aku bas. Aku brek sikit sambil slow-slow ke kanan. Kotak polisterin tu masih melayang sebab ringan. Ayah kat belakang suruh aku langgar je sebab ringan dia takkan efek sangat kot.
Tapi waktu tu otak dah takleh nak fikir apa, aku ikut je lah gerak hati macam mana pun. Alhamdulillah takde apa. Langgar sikit je kat belah kiri bumper. Dan aku masih dalam kawalan pemanduan tapi jantung waktu tu jangan cakaplah. Macam nak pecah! Haha.
Bas kat belakang pun sempat elak. Lepas tu kotak tu terus ke penghadang jalan. 4x4 tadi tu tak tahulah perasan ke tak ada barang jatuh daripada kenderaan dia.
Kesimpulannya, pemanduan tadi memang mencabar dan pandulah berhati-hati di jalan raya. Selamat pulang ke kampung semua!
The day before I received my final result for my undergraduate degree, some personal project just popped up into my mind. I want to start writing again. There are so many things I have been thinking that I am not able to express to people but I am able to express through my writings. So, I set up a blog. I have owned two blogs before. The first one I set up right after my Form 5 where blog is a ‘thing’ at that time. Like tiktok nowadays, but during my time, blogging is something that teenagers or youth will set up, as one of their social media. Instagram and Facebook came sooner after that and by having a blog, actually is a medium for me and my high school friends to connect and update each other by blogwalking. However, it started to slow down when people are slowly moving on to other updated social media which is more user friendly.
The reason why I don’t want to just continue from my previous blogs is because the old blog represents me in different ways. The first blog is more on my teenage self, the second blog is my self-recovery and this upcoming blog is to portray my mature self.
I am not keen to write on facebook again nowadays because I personally feel that my facebook friends are kind of mixed up now. I mean, the friends I am engaged with. Well, having different generations of friends, sometimes keeps me aware of my writing. Different people have perception. Writers write their opinion but other people may perceive differently. And social media nowadays is very scary, people may simply jump into conclusion and you will never know what they will understand from your writings. Indeed, it is our right to write and it is beyond our control to manage how people think, but I am the person who will easily get overwhelmed over recognition or comments; even though it is for improvement. Haha I don’t know what moves me to be super sensitive.
So, I think for my own well-being, I prefer to write in a place of non-judgemental. Not that I don’t like criticism but writing is my way of coping, to ventilate my feelings and a safe space to express.
And now, here I am, writing again, in hope for re-discovering myself and appreciating those who I met along my journey. Like an online journal for me, this place is somewhere you can find me and read my thoughts. Or maybe, once I have gone in this world, at least the person who left can remember me through my words.
Salam,
Amal
Ps: Excuse my grammar. I am not a pro in English. Accept the way I am. Ewahh. This blog will mix English and Malay content. But I won’t mix the language in one post. Oh ya, I will also include my unposted writing, where I just keep it in my notes, so there will be many backdated stories as well. Stay tuned!
